I have a question about choking. Or should it be likened to strangulation? I’ve recently found that being stuck around my neck is a huge turn on for me. I love to dominate and control and feel my partner’s power in this part of my body. I’m more interested in that feeling than breathing control or lack of oxygen. I’m reading about the choke because I’m trying to manage it in a way that I like as safely as possible. However, all the advice about choking is about how dangerous it is. But most advice focuses on the risk of oxygen restriction (which I don’t aim for) or damage to the airway by putting pressure on the front of the larynx (which my partners avoid). So my question is … how dangerous is a simulated choking game like this really? Do you play with light pressure where a person is holding their throat? What can we do to make it as safe as possible? I’m having a hard time coming up with good answers and given how wet it makes my pussy, giving up on this activity isn’t an option for me.
I need more expertise please
“Other forms of strangulation and breathing games were very rare,” said Dr. Debbie Herbenick. “But over the past decade, choking has become more common, especially among people under 40.”
Dr. Herbenik is a professor at the Indiana University School of Public Health, a sexuality researcher, and the widely published and author of numerous books, including Coregasm Training: A Revolutionary Approach to Better Sex Through Exercise. A few years ago, Dr. Herbenik’s students began asking him about suffocation, and some shared harrowing stories of being suffocated by their sexual partners without their consent. All of the porn sites had very little information about strangulation and this Dr. Herbenick and some colleagues to conduct the first serious and scientifically rigorous research on sexual strangulation.
Worryingly, Dr. Herbenik found that many people, mostly men, choke their partners during sex without first discussing it. In other words, they did not create mutual interest risks, they did not obtain unilateral consent, and they did not discuss the inherent risks and how to mitigate them. (Minimize ≠ eliminate.) Many people are unaware of the dangers, which makes sense given the lack of research on choking (and why Dr. Herbenick is studying mainstream practice today).
“The reason so many sites say choking is dangerous is because of this is It’s scary,” said Dr. Herbenick. “This is not a scare tactic. Although rare, people sometimes choke to death, which is technically a form of strangulation, and people go to prison for accidentally injuring or killing their partner during consensual strangulation.
According to Dr. Dr. Munkun, most people who try choking describe the action as “pleasant, desirable, and pleasurable.” Research by Gerbenik. This raises another concern: a false sense of security about it.
“Most people think they’re doing it ‘safely’ because they’ve experimented with choking without any obvious side effects, and that may not be the case,” said Dr. Herbenick. “Because people sometimes engage in choking repeatedly, there can be cumulative effects on the brain, meaning adverse effects that occur over time rather than from a single choking event. It is difficult to observe because of cumulative incidents. However, even gentle pressure on the neck/throat can reduce oxygen to the brain because it constricts blood vessels. The types of cumulative effects can include depression, anxiety, ringing in the ears, headaches, and memory problems, among others, but more research is needed to say for sure.
So is there a safe way to create a choking sensation or risk getting impaled on your neck?
“Some people who are choking but don’t want to take that risk ask their partner to press down on the collarbone instead of the throat,” said Dr. Herbenik. “And PINME is right, putting pressure on the front of the throat is especially dangerous, given how vulnerable the windpipe is. Other people choose to ask their partner to suffocate them, but rarely, to reduce the overall risk.
Of course, consenting to risky sex, such as suffocation, is only important if everyone involved is fully informed of the risks. When someone asks to be choked – someone like you, PINME, who asks to be choked during sex – they have a responsibility to fully inform their partner of the risks they are taking.
“It’s not appropriate to hold someone criminally or legally responsible for doing something that could accidentally hurt or kill you without fully understanding the risks they’re taking,” he said. Herbenick. “All that being said, adults can agree to all kinds of dangerous things: flogging, going barefoot, having sex with strangers, having unprotected sex after forgetting to take birth control pills for a week, skydiving, rock climbing and all kinds of water sports. In any dangerous activity, whether it is sexual or not, we must be aware of the potential risks, think about strategies to reduce potential harm, and act with caution.
What do reduction and/or worst-case scenario mitigation strategies for erotic suffocation hurt?
“If gentle pressure is used, make sure he’s able to breathe fully, speak, have safe speech and gestures, if he’s speechless – and wants gentle pressure.very gentle pressure – his partner understands him well, “said Dr. Herbenick. “Furthermore, if the PINME begins to experience visual changes, dizziness, lightheadedness or euphoria, this indicates that he may experience a decrease in oxygen and potential neurological effects.”
This is definitely a time when you want to use your safeword or PINME gesture whenever possible.
You are Dr. Debbie Herbenick on Twitter @DebbyHerbenick and learn more about her research on strangulation, sexual pleasure, communication, vibrator use and more at www.debbyherbenick.com.
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